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In: 2016, Hot Take

Hot Take: Do you hate your mother? Take her to see Mother’s Day. The worst movie of 2016 so far. Maybe the worst movie ever.

As I watched Mother’s Day, the stark realization came over me that time travel does not exist, at least not anything affordable to the masses. If it did, the future version of myself would have stopped me from suffering through this ill-conceived dumpster fire of a film that isn’t even relieving when the credits roll. The film opens and closes with a brutal Meghan Trainor song (called “Mom”) that is actually worse than Trainor’s “Dear Future Husband” which, if you’ve heard “Dear Future Husband” is stupefying. Read More →

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In: 2016, Hot Take

Hot Take: Pure tension and paranoia. Sitting in the theater was uneasy and I was glad to be sitting with my back against the wall.

A small time touring punk-rock band is going to land some shitty gigs. This is reality for any small time band, really. It’s hard to imagine a shittier gig than a deep woods dance hall for white supremacist neo-Nazis in the heart of the Pacific Northwest. However, now, thanks to Green Room, you don’t have to. After the band performs and heads out, they walk in on a murder scene and the punk rockers turned witnesses are thrown into a brutal, suspenseful fight for their life as they seemingly wait for the police but soon find out they’ll be lucky to make it out alive. Read More →

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In: 2016, Hot Take, Ranked, Trailers

The Jungle Book ran away with April as Disney landed it’s second big hit of the year. With Zootopia over $300 million and The Jungle Book headed there, Disney will likely have their biggest hit of 2016 so far in Captain America: Civil War. Welcome to the summer season! With 21 films slated for release in the month of May, here’s the trailers for all of them, ranked by anticipation:

1. Captain America: Civil War (May 6th)Read More →

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In: 2016, Hot Take

Hot Take: Are you a Ratchet & Clank fan? Are you 10 or younger? If your answer is “NO!” to both, stay away. If your answer is “YES!”, you still might want to stay away.

I worked in a video store for 15 years and remember when Ratchet & Clank came out for the Sony PlayStation 2. If you worked in a video store or knew someone who did, you know how you played every game and watched every movie. By the time, I left the industry, I had experienced six Ratchet & Clank games. Every time one came out, the shelf would be filled with copies and no one ever rented them. We’d always get a ridiculous amount of copies. Meanwhile, we’d get one copy of NCAA Football and some employee would have it out and the customers would be losing their mind they couldn’t get NCAA Football. That’s my memory of Ratchet & Clank.Read More →

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In: 2016, Hot Take

Hot Take: If you didn’t laugh your ass off watching Keanu, I don’t think you and I can be friends.

Full disclosure: Keanu was our most anticipated release of 2016.

Have you had a bad week? Do you need a laugh? Keanu has plenty. And a cute kitten to go with those laughs! What more could you ask for?
Read More →

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In: 2016, Hot Take

Hot Take: Elvis & Nixon are bigger than life characters and Shannon & Spacey do them up in an over-the-top style that’s very entertaining. Too bad the movie becomes nearly pointless.

I don’t know if Michael Shannon’s take on Elvis Presley is good or bad but it’s damn sure entertaining. To a lesser extent, so is Kevin Spacey as President Richard Nixon. The “untold” story behind the picture of Elvis & Nixon meeting at the White House isn’t nearly as entertaining as their performances but it’s mostly harmless and goofy fun… albeit a little pointless and the tread on the tires shows some serious wear at the end of this wild ride.Read More →

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In: 2016, Hot Take

Hot Take: What an embarrassing mistake!

It’s a daunting task to bring the life of Nina Simone to the big screen. Last year, not one but two documentaries were released about her life. There’s enough video for Simone, born Eunice Kathleen Waymon, to be brought to life without the help of an actress to tell her story. That doesn’t mean it can’t be done but when you make as many mistakes as writer/director Cynthia Mort does with the making of Nina, one has to ask why the hell did she bother?Read More →

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In: 2016, Hot Take

Hot Take: Don Cheadle’s depiction of Miles Davis is worth the price of admission.

It’s a shame Miles Ahead came out in April because Don Cheadle’s masterful turn as Miles Davis will be largely forgotten by the time Oscar season rolls around. The Academy doesn’t go out of it’s way to nominate performances from the first half of the year or ones by black actors so it’s pretty much a foregone conclusion Cheadle’s on-screen brilliance will get lost in the shuffle.Read More →

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In: 2016, Hot Take

Hot Take: More Jessica Chastain. More queens battling. Less everything else. (This is a wish list, not a description of the movie.)

The Huntsman: Winter’s War was entertaining. It also wasn’t very good. Surely, these are contradictory statements but true, too. Watching The Huntsman, it was hard to pin down who the audience was for it. If it was for fans of the first installment — Snow White and the Huntsman — then why remove Snow White from the tale? If it was aimed at a younger audience then why have sexual overtones, violence and crude language? If it is aimed at an older audience then why not make an attempt at giving maybe just one character a little bit of depth? If it is aimed at fans won over by the trailer then why not give the audience more of the queens than we actually get?Read More →

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In: 2016, Hot Take

Hot Take: Good characters. Boring movie. Unearned romance.

It’s hard to put into words the experience of watching A Hologram for the King. Some might say Tom Hanks is brilliant because, well, they always say he’s brilliant. He’s that everyman character he usually plays but he is out of place in Saudi Arabia, drinking illegal booze and even having sexual encounters. But that’s the Tom Hanks everyman in wolf’s clothing, all right. It’s a stranger in a strange land tale. Nowhere near the success Lost in Translation was. Nowhere near the disaster of Rock the Kasbah. Actually, the best comparison might be Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, if the lead were male and there was no war.Read More →